Moonlight
by jj4622
Summary: Elsa has always liked moonlight, and y the light of the moon, certain secrets will be revealed. Secrets about what she wants, what she suffers, and what she loves... (Yuri, Elsa x Henrietta. Don't like, don't read.)


**A/N: Well, hello there, Gunslinger Girl fandom. This is not my first Gunslinger Girl story on this site, but I deleted my first one when I realised I just couldn't carry on with it because it was... in all honesty, abysmal.**

**So, anyhow, this is of course a Yuri story, the pairing being Elsa x Henrietta. Which you would know if you'd read the summary. If you still somehow don't, then:**

**~~~~~~~WARNING! YURI IN THIS STORY! ~~~~~~**

**There. Consider yourself warned. If you don't like, guess what? DON'T READ! And if you do read and don't like it, don't flame. However, if there are legitimate criticisms, about my writing, or the story I wrote, and not just "Eww, Yuri!" or something similar, I welcome them.**

**Well, this was a long author's note. Now please, enjoy the story.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Gunslinger Girl. I wish I did though. So, so much...**

* * *

Elsa sat in her room, cleaning her gun. She liked to work by moonlight. It was one of the few things she enjoyed these days, though in truth she was never really happy. Just a bit less depressed. She looked out of the window and the corner of her mouth twitched as she saw the moon hanging in the sky, casting a beautiful silvery glow on the land. Elsa felt… not happy, but calm. Peaceful. At rest. It was a good feeling, or at least, she thought so. She was about to go back to her cleaning when her eyes fell on the picture in front of the window.

Once again, she stared at that fragment of Lauro's face. She felt herself tearing up over the thought that Lauro didn't care about her. _Lauro, what did I do to make you hate me..? _Her vision blurred and tears began to swim in her eyes. _Lauro-_

There was a knock at the door. Elsa immediately cleared her eyes and stood up, her gun in her arms. "Who's there?" she called. The door creaked open and a familiar face appeared in the opening. When Elsa recognised the person in the door, she wasn't sure what she was feeling. For the most part, she felt her usual feelings of dislike, annoyance, anger... all caused by her jealousy of Henrietta's relationship with her handler. _If only Lauro treated me like Jose treats Henrietta._ However, there were other feelings, feelings of hope and excitement. _If only I could act on those feelings... and what is this fluttery sensation in my chest? _"What do you want?" she asked looking away to conceal the turmoil in her eyes.

Henrietta, the girl who she'd watched out of the corner of her eye since she'd arrived at the agency. She wasn't sure why, but she'd seen her laughing with Rico and Triela, and… She'd wanted to join with them, but something stopped her from doing so. When Triela had asked her if she was okay with what they were being taught, she hadn't replied nicely or politely. She'd been as sarcastic as she could imagine. She'd never even spoken to Henrietta.

"I thought... I thought that maybe, we could talk." Henrietta looked apprehensive, but her face was, as usual, open and honest.

"We have nothing to talk about." Was Elsa's reply, her voice as cold and dispassionate as usual.

Henrietta looked hurt, but she carried on in vain hope. "But... it sounds like we might be working together someday soon..."

Elsa sat down, her eyes still closed. "Well, I'll warn you now. If you even think about getting in Lauro's way, you'll regret it." The hurt look on Henrietta's face should have made her feel good, but instead, she felt sad that she'd done that to her. The way the moonlight played on Henrietta's skin made her look strangely beautiful. _Huh... why am I thinking that... maybe I should ask Lauro... no, he'd just condition me till I forget about it._

Henrietta recomposed herself, though the hurt was still evident in her features. "Elsa, why do you push us all away?" Elsa thought for a moment, but only a brief moment.

"Tell me, who's more important to you, your handler, or the other cyborgs?" Henrietta looked surprised at the question. "My handler's the most important thing to me. Nothing else matters." She didn't believe a word of that. "Nothing." She repeated, but it was as if she was actually trying to convince herself. "Everything I do, is for the sake of our Fratello." Elsa started to polish her gun again. "When Lauro's gone, and I'm left here alone... I think about him. What he's doing... Even though I know tomorrow may be the last day of our lives..." Elsa was confused with what she was saying, yet she didn't stop. _Why? Why do I say these things? Is it for her sake or for my own?_ "Don't talk to me about us. We have our handlers, and that's it." The wounded look on Henrietta's face was heartbreaking. Yet Elsa wouldn't allow herself even the slightest bit of emotion. _Is this what the conditioning makes us? Heartless monsters that can't admit the fact we admire or respect the other's, for fear of getting hurt? I wish to tell her how I feel, how I see her and the other's, how I wanted to be their friends, but every time I try to, it's like my body overrules me and does something different. Something it's programmed to do. And I can't fight it. And I want to fight it so much._

Henrietta was trembling, and she sounded both angry and sad. "That's not... You know that's not true! I like Jose, I like him a lot, but there's got to be more for us than just that!" There were tears in her eyes when she spoke, yet... She still looked hopeful.

_Henrietta... I wish I could be your friend but... I can't do it! I don't know if it's the conditioning or something else, but it won't let me be your friend!_ To Henrietta though, she merely replied, "Well, I... I don't think there's anything... left to talk about..." Her heart was being ripped to pieces, yet something she couldn't identify – Though if she'd had any money, she'd have bet it all on the conditioning – was stopping her from admitting what she felt to Henrietta. "Would you... just, please go..."

Henrietta turned to leave, but something made her turn her head at the door. She looked back at Elsa with a puzzled expression. "I'll go, but answer me one thing first... If I don't matter... If you truly believe everything you just said... Why are you crying?"

Elsa stared back in shock, her hand creeping up to her face. She touched her cheek, to find it soaked. She looked down at her clothes to find them stained with tears. She slowly shifts her gaze back up to Henrietta. Henrietta stares back, unmoving, and Elsa is unable to look away. "I… I don't… know…"

All at once, a memory struck Elsa. A memory of earlier in the day…

* * *

_Elsa stood by the window as she spoke to Triela. "What is it now?" She asked in an irritated tone._

_Triela looked at her with a soft, warm smile. "Elsa, is something wrong? You seem irritable today… well, more so than usual anyway." She added the last part with an impish grin, and a small part of Elsa's mind enjoyed this, this conversation with someone who she hoped to call a friend. She felt the corner of her mouth twitch, but then that same thing that had stopped her talking to the others before stopped her from smiling now._

_She wanted to tell Triela what was wrong, but instead she simply said, "Nothing."_

"_Really? Well, I think something is bothering you, and it's better to share than to…" Triela's voice faded into the background noise as Henrietta walked into the hallway. She looked over at the two of them, and Elsa kept her gaze fixed rigidly on Triela, but as soon as she turned to walk away, Elsa let her eyes wander over to her, and she felt a pain in her chest as she realised once more that whatever had been done to her meant they could never be friends. "…And of course, you should- Elsa? Elsa? Elsa, are you there? Earth to Elsa!?" Triela was about to wave her hand in front of Elsa's face, but she instead followed her gaze to see the disappearing form of Henrietta. She smirked as she watched Elsa stare at her._

_When Henrietta turned the corner and vanished, Elsa looked back to where Triela was… only to find she was gone. "Having fun there?" Came the teasing words from behind. Elsa turned to find Triela leant against the wall watching her._

"_Umm…" Elsa could feel the blush spreading across her cheeks._

"_So, why were you staring at Henrietta?"_

"_Umm… I… I… Well, you see I really wanted to-" All of a sudden, Elsa felt her body convulse, her stomach retching as she felt she was about to throw up. "I- Urk!" Sweat beaded on her forehead and there was a throbbing pain in her head. She ran into the toilets and stood over the sink, vomiting into the bowl, after she'd finished, she stepped back, weak and shaky, before she fell against the wall. She landed in a seated position, with her back leant on the wall. She heard the door open and looked at Triela as she walked in._

"_Elsa?" Triela asked as she looked at Elsa. Seeing what had happened, she turned on the tap to wash away the evidence. "It's the conditioning, isn't it? That's why you're so cold to us…" Elsa could only nod in response. "Well then, I won't make you do something that hurts you…" Triela said with a sigh. But as she turned to leave, she smiled slightly as she heard Elsa say something. _

"_Thank you, Triela…"_

* * *

"I do know why I'm crying, actually." Elsa said with a grimace. "But I… I can't… I…" Elsa slipped off the chair and fell to her knees, her head pounding as she tried to tell Henrietta what she wanted to say. "I… It's the…" She paused, coughing and spluttering. _I can't fail now… I have to tell her._ "C-condit- urk… its t-th-he con-conditioning." Elsa gasped for air as she collapsed, rolling onto her back. Now that she'd got what she was trying to say out, the pressure in her head and the sick feelings were gone.

"You mean… It's the conditioning making you push us away?" Henrietta asked, kneeling by Elsa's head. "Oh well… should I go then? I don't want you to hurt yourself…"

"N-no… please stay." Elsa said. "I… really… ah!" Elsa gasped as the pain returned once more, that throbbing, pounding feeling in her head that came whenever she tried to defy the conditioning. "I… I want you to… Ugh… Ahhh!" Elsa let out a short, sharp cry of pain as the pressure in her head intensified.

"Elsa! Please, stop it! Don't hurt yourself for this!" Henrietta's voice was frantic, like she was terrified that Elsa would either faint or seriously hurt herself.

"Henrietta... I want to tell you... I always admired you..." Elsa paused, coughing but trying as hard as she could to carry on. Her face felt warm and she lifted her hand to her nose, pulling it away to find it smeared with blood. "I always wanted- ugh… I wanted to be… friends… with you… and… and with Triela, and… Rico… all of you…" The, pain and the struggle to tell Henrietta what she thought of her were taking their toll on Elsa, and she began feeling so very tired. _Why do I fight so hard, just for her? What is it about her that makes me want to push on so much? I tried with Triela, but I couldn't do it, so why does Henrietta give me the determination to struggle on? What's different about her? _Suddenly a thought struck Elsa. _How I feel about her, this struggling, the way I couldn't keep my eyes off her… do I really..? _"Henrietta, there… there's something else." Suddenly, the tiredness intensified, and Elsa had to struggle with all her will not to fall unconscious. "Henrietta, I…" Elsa felt her mind slipping into unconsciousness, but as she blacked out, she said what she had been trying to say all along.

"I love you."

* * *

Elsa awoke in her room, on her bed, unsure of how long had passed. Looking outside, she summarised that she must have been unconscious for about an hour. Wondering what had happened, she looked to the other side of the room to see Henrietta there, asleep in Elsa's chair. The chair had been turned to face Elsa's bed. She smiled at the peaceful expression on Henrietta's face. Slipping out of her bed, she paused to ponder how she got there, before deciding Henrietta must have moved her. With a grin on her face – Something most people would have been shocked to have seen – She tiptoed over to Henrietta, before gently shaking her awake.

Henrietta awoke with a start, jumping up and knocking the chair over in her haste to stand up. Noticing that it was Elsa who awoke her, she blushed. "Sorry" she whispered, a few stray strands of hair hanging over her face.

Elsa simply grinned a little bit more. "Thank you for putting me on my bed Henrietta."

"No problem. So, uh… Elsa, did you really mean what you said earlier?"

"Which bit?" Elsa asked curiously.

"Well, the bit about liking us all, and wanting to be our friends…" Henrietta asked shyly.

"Yes, I meant it. I don't know why, but something in my conditioning wouldn't let me tell you or the others that I wanted to be your friend."

"But…" Henrietta said, confusion in her eyes, "Why are you talking normally about it now?"

"I don't know, but I think it might be something to do with my subconscious. I mean, that's what the conditioning works on, right?"

Henrietta looked unconvinced. "I'm not sure Elsa, but we could ask Claes. She seems to know a lot about everything."

"That sounds like it might be a good idea." Elsa mused thoughtfully. "But we'll have to wait till tomorrow morning to see if she does know. I doubt she'd be happy with us if we woke her up in the middle of the night – And I can't see Triela being very pleased either."

"You're right, Triela's always grumpy if she's woken up early," She said, "And I'd rather not have a grumpy Triela throwing teddies at me." She added with a giggle.

"…Teddies?" Elsa asked with a smirk.

"Don't ask. Just don't." Henrietta said with a grin. Then, she paused and looked down. "Elsa?"

"What's wrong?" Elsa replied.

"Umm… did you mean it when you said you love me?" Henrietta mumbled.

"…Yes, I did. Well, I think I did at least…"

"What do you mean by that?"

"Well, I feel… confused… I don't know. I think it's love, and if it isn't, then… I have no idea what it is…" Elsa replied with confusion in her voice.

"Well, for what it's worth… I think I love you too."

Elsa couldn't believe what she was hearing. "Do you really mean that?"

"Yes. When you made yourself to black out, I... I realised that I didn't ever know you for who you truly were... And then I realised how brave, and strong you are, and how much none of us realised that. I mean, you fought through your conditioning, just to tell me you wanted to be my friend. I've never tried to go against my conditioning, so I can't imagine what it would be like. All I know is... It really meant a lot to me that you went through all that for me." Henrietta smiled as she took Elsa's hand in her own. "Besides, I always thought you were pretty."

"Really?" Elsa said with some surprise.

"Yes... but I never thought it would lead to this."

"I doubt anyone expected this..." Elsa murmured. "Still... if we both love each other, does that make us lovers?"

"I think it does, but then... What do we do now?" Henrietta asked.

"Well, umm... we could spend the night here, if you'd like..." Elsa whispered in her ear. In truth she was slightly afraid of how Henrietta would respond to that, but she needn't have worried.

"Of I would, Elsa. After all, it's not like I would leave you alone after you fainted." She said with a slight grin. Elsa smiled with her, pulling back the covers on her bed, as they both slipped under them. She then pulled the covers over them, turning and facing Henrietta, who was already facing her. The two of them stared at each other, smiling, for a few minutes that felt to them like hours, before they slowly moved closer to one another. Wrapping their arms around each other, they relished in each other's warmth. Slowly, their faces moved closer together, until finally, they kissed. Their tongues writhed in each other's mouths as they kissed, a fight for dominance neither could win, tasting each other as much as they could. However, before they could go any further, they fell asleep due to the strain of the past few hours.

* * *

Elsa awoke to the sound of Henrietta's breathing; her head nestled in the crook of Elsa's neck. Their bodies were pressed close together, and Elsa smiled at the feeling of pure joy she had at being in Henrietta's arms. She looked down and her joy only grew as she saw the peaceful smile on Henrietta's face. Kissing her forehead, she watched Henrietta slowly awaken from her deep sleep. "Good morning Henrietta."

"Mmm… good morning Elsa..." Henrietta said. "I don't have to see Jose today. Do you have to go see Lauro?"

"No, I don't think so. Why do you ask?"

"Well, that means we have the whole day to ourselves. So, what should we do?"

"Well, we could go ask Claes about my conditioning. Also, it would be nice to try and talk to your friends."

"Sure!" Henrietta practically chirped out her answer. "I can't wait for you to meet all of our friends!"

"Our friends?" Elsa asked.

"Well sure. They're m y friends, so they're your friends too, right? Anyway, can we stop by my room first? I need to change my clothes." She replied. "Actually, come to think of it, we should have a shower really, shouldn't we?"

"Okay, sure. A shower actually sounds good." Elsa said with a small sigh. "So, I'll get some clothes, and you can get some from your room. We'll have a shower, get dressed and meet at Triela's room, okay?" Henrietta nodded. "All right then, let's go." They got up out of the bed and went their separate ways, Henrietta heading for the door whilst Elsa went for her clothes.

* * *

"Hey there!" Triela greeted Henrietta as she walked up to her room, her hair still slightly damp from her shower. She assumed Elsa was still in the shower, and would be there shortly. "So, how are you doing?"

"Really, I've been doing brilliantly." Henrietta said with a smile.

"Really? Why's that?"

"Well, you see..." At that moment a voice from behind interrupted her.

"Henrietta!" Henrietta turned to see Elsa there, her hair slightly damp but still tied into her trademark plaits.

"Elsa, you're here!" Henrietta hugged Elsa tightly. Triela smiled at the two of them, almost instantly guessing what was going on.

"Well, it's nice to see some people's love-lives aren't as awful as the rest of ours."

"L-love life? I've got no idea what you're talking about." Elsa said. Henrietta giggled.

"Oh Elsa, I don't think we've got any chance of convincing her otherwise now."

Elsa groaned. "Well, I was hoping to keep it a secret from the biggest gossip in the Agency for a little while longer." Triela looked indignant, but Henrietta felt herself smile slightly, knowing Elsa was right about Triela's gossiping – she wasn't always like that, but she had a reputation.

"I do not gossip!" She said indignantly. Elsa merely arched her eyebrow in response. "Okay... maybe a little..." She sighed in defeat. Perking up quickly, she looked at Elsa with a slightly puzzled expression. "So why are you here then?"

"Well, I wanted to ask Claes something, and to make some new fri- frien... ah..." Elsa's head began to pound the moment she started to tell Triela what she was doing. Henrietta, recognising the signs of Elsa's conditioning affecting her, held her in a tight embrace – As much for physical support as for emotional support. "Ah... I'd really... like to make... some new... friends..." She managed to cough out, the pain in her head reducing her ability to speak.

Triela recognised the signs of Elsa's conditioning too. "Of course you can make friends, Elsa. I'd like to think you were my friend." All at once, the pain in Elsa's head vanished.

"Thank you, Triela..." She smiled.

Triela looked puzzled once again. "Is that it? The moment you make a friend, the pain goes away?"

"That's what we want to ask Claes about." Elsa replied.

"Well, come in then!" Triela grinned. Entering the room, Triela looked at the bunk bed, and called to the person reading on top. "Claes, there are people here to see you."

Claes looked down at them. "Hello Henrietta. And... Elsa? Well, I wasn't really expecting to see you, but what's the problem?"

"Well," Elsa began, "We wanted to ask your advice on the conditioning. You see, we think it was used on me to do something odd..."

* * *

"Hmm, that is odd," Claes mused after Elsa explained the events of the past night and morning. "My guess would be a combination of the regular conditioning and... PHS? Yes, it's plausible..."

All three of the others looked blank. "PHS?" Elsa asked.

"Oh yes, sorry. PHS means Post Hypnotic Suggestion. It's what they use in hypnotherapy."

"But I thought that post hypnotic suggestion only worked if you wanted it to? Elsa didn't, that's why she's fighting it so hard. And besides, PHS doesn't have the same effect as conditioning if you go against it." Triela interjected.

"Yes, you're right... perhaps you were put into a hypnotic state, and Lauro gave you an order? That might give an effect like your handler telling you to do something, only permanently there, in your subconscious. Whilst your conscious doesn't want to obey, your subconscious tries to force it into submission – and does so with an effect much like when any of us try to disobey an order from our handler – Well, actually only you three. I haven't got a handler, so I wouldn't know what it's like."

"Yeah, you're probably right…" Triela said. "It was bound to be something like that, wasn't it?"

"I guess so…" Elsa agreed. "Although, I do have one other question. If that's the case, why does the pain come when I try to make friends or be nice, but go away once someone says they're my friend?"

"Subconscious suggestion is a tricky thing. It has to be very precise. In your instance, Lauro might have said 'I forbid you from making friends' but if your subconscious considers being or having friends and making friends two different things – Which they are – Then an order about one won't affect the other."

"I guess that kind of makes sense. Well, thank you Claes…" Elsa replied.

"Yeah, thanks Claes!" Henrietta giggled. Turning to Elsa, she hugged her as tight as she could. Elsa smiled as she looked down at Henrietta's face. As the Elsa heard the door open, she was about to turn and look at it when Henrietta kissed her. Once again, it was passionate and intense, but this time, Elsa was caught by surprise, and completely at the mercy of Henrietta. Trying to gain control, she quickly gave up and submitted to Henrietta. She actually quite liked the feeling of Henrietta's tongue controlling her own, and when Henrietta broke away she merely looked at her, blinking.

"Umm… What are you doing?" A small voice called from the doorway.

Elsa whipped her head around to see what was happening. Triela's face was a picture of joy and happiness, and it looked like she thoroughly enjoyed have to young lovers to gush over. Claes looked at them in shock and disbelief, her mouth hanging open and her glasses sliding off her face. And Rico and Angelica stood in the doorway, identical looks of confusion and bewilderment plastered across their faces.

Elsa sighed. _Now I have to hope they don't tell their handlers…_

* * *

**A/N: So, how did I do? I hope the ending wasn't too disappointing. There will not be a sequel, as I can't be bothered to work out how this would affect the storyline of GSG. Anyway, as I said above, Review please, criticisms are welcome, flames will be fed to Ben, my pet Salamander.**

**Wishing you all the best,**

**JJ46232, Over and Out.**


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